Long Distance Relationships

Three words that no one in a relationship wants to hear in the same sentence. They are the eerie calm before the storm, the raging fire before the smoke, the beginning of the end. They are my life. My name is Tanita... And I am in a long distance relationship (cue applause).

After only seven and a half months in the same town (as a couple), my boyfriend graduated and left me at University with a further two years on the clock. He lives around 300 miles away and leads a busy life as a trainee actuary. I have commitments in my small town to my degree and my part-time job. It has been almost eight months since we have been so far apart, but we are still going strong. How in the hell? Right?

I am not going to deny that the long distance thing has its challenges. Everyday that I am not able to hug him, hold his hand, or stroke his hair is a day that I resent. And the moments that we can catch together are always bittersweet. Regardless of how much I try to relish the time that we have in the same city, those words are always in the back of my mind – long distance relationship – taunting me with their unyielding power. We can have all of the fun in the world but at the end of it one of us has to leave. And no one can veil the sadness that comes with leaving the person you love alone on a train station platform… Every 2 to 3 weeks.

Me and my beau <3

But we go through all of that heartache because we love each other. There is a future here and we are not going to let three measly words jeopardise that. No one has ever made me feel so safe and loved within the same room, let alone from 300 miles away! Why would I let him go without a fight? And it is a fight. But we both put the effort in, and that is what counts: phone calls everyday, Skype video chats when it’s convenient, and even the odd handwritten letters. It is such a cliché, but communication really is the key. Just because you aren’t in the same town, doesn’t mean the rules change.

Agreeing to be in a long distance relationship is probably the dating world’s number one faux pas, and many (including myself, 8 months ago) would have you believe that it could never work out. After all, cynicism is the easy way out of an unavoidably arduous and heartbreaking situation. Love, though, is the easy way in.

I am in a long distance relationship with the love of my life and I wouldn’t change it for the world.